I was reminded by my childhood friend's mom because she shares the same birthday. Each year when I would talk to my "Aunt Cathy" on her birthday, we would reflect on the fact that this was also my mom's birthday too. So last night when we were chatting on facebook and I told her, "Happy one day before your birthday," she said I am thinking about you too. I was taken back a bit and then I was reminded about August 13th.
What would I have done today if my mom was still alive? I would do what I do with my mom now or my mother in-law: phone call, card, present, birthday dinner, etc. So many memories missed and so many memories lost. I wish I could remember her more. I have to look at a picture to remember what she looks like. She doesn't pop into my head anymore. All I have our the memories of others and I have to believe them.
I am told I had an amazing mother and that she helped so many people. I am told that I look like her, talk like her, stand like her and even walk like her. I choose to believe these things because that is all I have. So when I get sad that I do not remember her, I just look in the mirror and tell myself " I am her memory." I came from her and even though she is not here with me on earth she will always be in my heart.
Some many years missed!!!! I know she can't see this but I don't care....
"Happy Birthday Mommy and I long for the day when I can see you again. You owe me so many hugs and kisses!!!"
3 comments:
That post was sureal and so sweet!!! I'll be ligting the memory candle for her tonight.
Wow, babe!! Tear jerker. How I wish I could have met her. I miss Dad too!! So much. Love you!
Very sweet. I am getting to that point to with my own dad...doesn't that suck...ugh
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